Midnight Surrender (Freedom Fighters Series Book 2) Page 21

  Alec was home.

  Chapter Thirty Six: Mal

  Mal continued to puff on his cigar, flicking ash periodically onto the ground. Anyone watching would be able to notice the perpetual frown he wore on his face. Confusion flitted across his handsome features. What had he done?

  He could hardly believe the words had left his mouth. In the span of a moment he had crushed and broken all of his dreams. He had actually helped Alec reunite with Lizzie. The worst of it was, he was not that upset. Why? What was the matter with him?

  He was still contemplating his stupidity when a voice interrupted his thoughts.

  “That was kind,” Sam told him, joining him on the springy grass.

  Mal sighed. “It was surprising.”

  “Why? Because you love Lizzie? Or because you love Alec?” He asked bluntly.

  Shock registered on Mal’s face. “What!?” He sputtered.

  Sam chuckled, clapping Mal on the back. “Anyone with eyes can see you love Lizzie. But I wonder if you realize that you love Alec too?”

  Mal leaned back against the grass, resting on his elbows. “Like a brother.”

  Sam nodded. “That’s precisely why you helped them both. It was noble and kind.”

  “I’m still in shock,” he admitted, smirking.

  Sam laughed and shook his head. “Maybe so but it shows a great strength of character.”

  Mal shrugged uncomfortably. He hated compliments. He never knew how to take one.

  Sam noticed and changed the subject. “Alec will leave soon.”

  Mal breathed a sigh of relief at the change of subject and then scowled. Lizzie would be hurt when Alec left her again.

  “I know…and I will be there for Lizzie when he does,” Mal promised.

  Sam pulled a blade of grass out of the ground and began to twirl it in his fingertips.

  “I’m glad she has your friendship,” he responded carefully.

  Mal was cautious. If Sam had something to say, he needed to say it.

  “Yes,” Mal conceded, but he would not consent to anything else.

  “She loves you both. I’ve seen her look at you Malcolm,” Sam observed.

  Mal clenched his jaw. Sam was stalling. If he was fishing, Mal was not going to take the bait.

  Sam sighed. “You think I am judging you.”

  Mal shrugged. That is exactly what he thought. “If you are that’s your business.”

  Tension filled the space between them. Sam seemed disturbed by the tone of the conversation. Mal watched him closely, expecting to have to defend himself if necessary.

  “You misunderstand me. My point is that love is complicated.”

  Of course love was complex. He lived with it daily. It sucked.

  “Is that supposed to mean something to a broken heart?” He asked, more anger in his voice than he intended.

  “Just the opposite I suppose. I imagine it’s hardly any consolation at all,” Sam responded truthfully.

  Mal blew out a long breath. “I’m not sure you are making any sense.”

  “You know what?” Sam asked, laughing. “I don’t think I make a lick of sense at all. Just ask Carol.”

  Mal chuckled despite his reluctance. Sam was a good guy. He was the same age as Mal’s father would have been, had he survived. The thought sobered him.

  “How do you deal with it?” He asked Sam, certain he already knew what he was going to say.

  Sam rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “You stay true to yourself, Malcolm. If you do that, no matter what happens, you won’t have any regrets.”

  Mal nodded, knowing he would say something like that. It was good in theory, but not very practical in application.

  “Of course,” Sam continued, “I’ve always thought it good practice to think with your head instead of your cock. Gets you in less trouble.”

  Mal burst out laughing, clutching his sides with humor. That was unexpected.

  “Truer words were never spoken,” he agreed, smiling.

  Sam stood up, brushing dirt and grass from his jeans. “I think you have all of that covered Malcolm. Your father would be proud of the man that you have become. I see only honor, courage, and devotion. Try not to let the shadows of the past dictate your future. See you at dinner, son.”

  He walked away whistling, still playing with the blade of grass.

  Mal sat contemplating his words and blinking back tears. How did Sam know what Mal needed to hear? How did he know the secret anxieties of his heart?

  Stunned and grateful, he looked up at the sky. He hoped, in the inner recesses of his heart, that Sam was right. He took a deep breath and watched the clouds swirling into each other. Somewhere, up in heaven if that existed, his father watched from beyond the grave. And Mal hoped he made him proud.

  Chapter Thirty Seven: Lizzie

  I stood with Alec, clutching him close, trying at the last minute to prevent him from leaving.

  “If you never go, I never have to worry that you won’t return,” I argued, determined to convince him that none of this mattered.

  Who cared if someone leaked the location of the base? It was past. Nothing. No part of our future, so why risk his life, leaving again, only to face the uncertainty that he may not return?

  “Lizzie, I will be back. I have a son or daughter being born soon.”

  I sighed. I would never convince him. “I wish you would listen to what I am saying.”

  “This is the last time Lizzie,” he promised, “I’ll be able to stay with you after this. I have to tie up all the loose ends and make sure my family is safe. Trust me, my love.”

  He lowered his lips to mine, one hand on my lower back, the other cupping my cheek. He was gentle. Loving. So confident and sure that I almost believed him.

  I wanted to. But I could not.

  “Come back to me,” I whispered, “promise me you will come back to me.”

  Tears filled my eyes and spilled over.

  “Always, my darling, my love,” he answered, “I will always come back to you my Lizzie.”

  That was hours ago now. I stood outside by the bungalow, watching Mal play with Benjamin, my heart afraid of what the future would hold.

  If only I possessed the gift of insight, to know what would happen in advance, then perhaps I could have prevented the dull ache and underlying fear that lodged in my chest. Worse was the persistent thought that danger still lurked, hidden but watchful, and safety was only an illusion. The mystery of the intruder back on that militia base had never been solved. The stranger was still alive, out there somewhere, and possibly intent on finishing what he had started.

  The danger was far from over.

  I waved and blew a kiss to my son as he walked across the grass and held a delicate butterfly in his open palm. So precious. So innocent. So pure.

  There is a point in your life, a very tiny window of opportunity, in which you can alter or change the course of action that you are on by choosing a small action. A phrase. A gesture. A word of comfort. A kiss. A lie.

  For good or ill, the course of action can be altered. It may be so slight you do not see it in time. It may be so large you cannot contain it enough to make a difference. It may be so complicated that you cannot maneuver it. But if you catch it, at just the precise moment, the entire course of history can be altered.

  I missed my chance. I recognized the signs too late. My window of opportunity sped by, closing with a slam, and the course of events that followed would be disastrous. I should have listened to my gut. At least I should have listened to my heart but I did not. In fact, in stubborn and willful pride, I sped along the course of action to its terrifying conclusion. Nothing would prepare me for the horror that would come. And nothing could change its devastation.

  “A penny for your thoughts,” I heard a soft voice say behind me.

  “I’m afraid it would take a million dollars to sort them out,” I admitted.

  Mal contemplated my answer and then smiled. “I may not have money but I do have l
ots of time.”

  I held out my hand and he took it, pulling me into his strong embrace, rubbing my back in soothing circles. I wanted to talk it out, to share with him the burden of my heart, but I was unable. The words lodged in my throat, unwilling to release.

  “It’s all right sweetheart,” he whispered, “You don’t have to say anything.”

  How did he always know exactly what I needed? Or exactly what I was feeling? Mal was an amazingly astute and generous person. The entire time I have known him, I have never seen him behave in a way that was selfish, dishonorable, or unkind. He was the best person I knew, better even than Alec and me, because we definitely had our fair share of faults.

  As Mal held me I realized that he was near perfect. A person I could never hope or deem to deserve and yet he was always here, stalwart, unflinching, and loyal, even to a fault. In fact, the only imperfection I saw in Mal was his inane ability to put everyone else first. Especially me. He sacrificed his own happiness for that of others. Only selfless people do that.

  I squeezed him tight. “You are the best and most selfless person I know Mal.”

  He laughed lightly. “Hardly, but thank you Lizzie.”

  I glanced up at him and shook my head. “No, really, you are.” I placed my hands on his cheeks. “You are the most wonderful man I know.”

  His eyes softened as they held my gaze. “I’m a fool Lizzie. I’m not selfless. I do everything for you, because of you, and that is it.”

  I smiled. “Precisely. That makes you selfless, simply because even if it hurts you, you still choose to do the right thing.”

  He quirked an eyebrow. “I guess I just have to accept that it is true then.” Humor danced in his blue eyes, making them crinkle slightly and brighten like a cloudless sky on a summer day.

  “Yes,” I insisted, “I am always right you know.”

  He threw back his head and laughed, hugging me tighter. “God, I love you.”

  I lay my head against his chest. “I love you too Mal.”

  I meant that. I did love him, as much as I loved Alec. Even with all of the turmoil and the constant chaos of life during war, that fact remained true. It was unchanging. If anything I loved both Alec and Mal more now than I had even six months ago, which is pretty incredible.

  I was faithful to Alec. These thoughts were not a betrayal to my husband. They were simple facts. I would not cross the boundary set forth by my marriage vows. I loved Mal differently, just as incredibly strong and unyielding.

  That’s why I could not let him leave. Why I would fight tooth and nail to keep him by my side. And why I would always think of him as the most important person in my life, sharing the space that Alec occupied. They both owned my heart. How could I deny it?

  The afternoon passed pleasantly. After dinner we lingered on the front porch with Carol and Sam and Mike, sharing good conversation and cups of steaming coffee. I was sipping on hot tea, laughing with the rest of the group at Benjamin’s antics with his cars, when a lone vehicle, a car that was new to the camp, started approaching us from the long dirt packed drive.

  As the vehicle pulled to a stop I jumped up, a huge smile on my face.

  “Lizzie!”

  “Diva!” I yelled and ran down the steps to greet her.

  We hugged like two school girls, jumping up and down, and squealing with delight.

  “You look wonderful. Married life agrees with you,” I told her, a huge smile on my face.

  She smiled her usual grin, pointing at her belly. “I should think so. I’m three months along now.”

  “Oh Diva,” I exclaimed, hugging her again, “I’m so happy for you.”

  “Congratulations,” Mal added, shaking hands with Donnovan.

  “Thanks,” he beamed, shooting a Diva a wide smile.

  “How are you both?” I asked, looking at Donnovan.

  “Good, better than good, great actually.”

  I nodded and introduced them to Carol and Sam. The camp was full, all of the rooms and bungalows occupied. It left somewhat of a dilemma. Sam and Carol insisted she have a bed to sleep in instead of a tent which required some last minute juggling of room assignments. Mike finally gave his up, temporarily, until a solution could be reached.

  I spent the next few days with Diva, laughing and catching up, generally thrilled to have a close friend to talk to again. I had grown close to Carol but she was more of a mother figure than a best friend. I had missed Diva. We spent hours talking, watching Benjamin, and enjoying the nice weather.

  The days passed into weeks. I fell into a regular routine with Benjamin and preparing for the arrival of my second child. I wondered if I was carrying another son or a daughter this time. There was no way to tell. With Benjamin I had an ultrasound but with this pregnancy it had not been possible. I should have tried to find out in the hospital but it never occurred to me when I was volunteering.

  One morning I awoke with a pounding headache after a sleepless night full of nightmares. I don’t know why I was having such weird dreams. Was it the pregnancy?

  I was in a poor and pissy mood with Alec’s departure and now it was getting worse by the minute. The pregnancy hormones hardly helped my ability to think rationally. Add in the lack of sleep and the achy head and I was not capable of handling life well at the moment.

  Trying to push my attitude to the side, I sat down to lunch with Mal, Donnovan, Diva, and Benjamin. We ate sandwiches at a couple of wooden picnic benches in the shade down by the lake. Ice cold lemonade filled the glasses, thanks to Carol.

  “So, Lizzie, how did you end up finding this place?” Diva asked.

  “Well, that’s all Alec. I came here after the hospital. Mal brought us when we needed a new place to stay,” I replied, munching on chicken salad.

  “Mama, mo,” Ben asked. He always wanted more. He could eat a ton, just like his father.

  I gave my son more grapes and chicken salad, looking up at Diva.

  “Why were you in the hospital?” Hadn’t she heard about the bombing?

  “Bombers,” I explained, “hit the bunker where I was staying.”

  “What?” She gasped, truly surprised. “How? Where were you?”

  I opened my mouth to answer when Donnovan said “Green Acre Hills.”

  The glass I was holding slipped from my hand. “What did you say?”

  He seemed startled, his eyes darting from my face to Mal. “I…uh…”

  I stood, trembling slightly in disbelief and anger. Only three other people beside me knew the location of that bunker. Big Dog, Alec, and Mal. I knew for certain no one had mentioned it to anyone, even after we came from the hospital. It was one of the few ways Alec and I were certain to obtain the name of the leak. Even Mal had agreed.

  “Answer her,” Mal grit between his teeth, standing next to me.

  Diva looked confused. “What is the matter? What are you guys so upset about?”

  “Only the four of us knew the location of the hideout,” I answered, “and Donnovan was not one of them.”

  Diva paled slightly. “I am sure that you are wrong.”

  “Ask your husband Diva,” I demanded, “but I think the look on his face says it all.”

  She turned to him, her eyes wide. “Did you leak Lizzie’s location to the militia?”

  Donnovan stood and began to pace. “I had no choice.”

  “What!?” I exploded, launching myself toward him but Mal pulled me back.

  “Lizzie almost died Donnovan. You almost killed four innocent lives. She was newly pregnant and Benjamin was with us,” Mal yelled angrily, pushing me back and stalking toward him.

  Donnovan frowned. “I had no choice,” he repeated, raising his hands.

  “How long have you been feeding information to the militia? Since the beginning?” Mal asked but there was no doubt he was certain.

  “Yes, I had to. They were going to kill me.”

  “And you thought your life was worth the lives of innocent women and children?” Mal had a murd
erous look on his face.

  Diva buried her face in her hands. “Oh God, how was I so blind?”

  Mal reached Donnovan and shoved him back, launching into a full blown attack. I grabbed Benjamin and turned his face toward my chest so he would not see the violence.

  “How could you?” Diva screeched, jumping from the table.

  It was chaos. Carol and Sam ran down from the main house and I passed Benjamin into her arms. “Take him away from here please. I will explain later,” I promised. She nodded and headed back up toward the house.

  Sam was trying to separate the two men, which was really only a one sided fight. Mal was kicking his ass all over the lake. I was not about to join in but a sudden thought made me panic.

  “Donnovan, did you tell the militia about this place?” I asked, terrified of the answer.

  He looked into my eyes. “No.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief but then I had no real idea if he was telling me the truth or not.

  “Have you leaked Alec’s location?” I asked, taking a deep breath, hoping he had not done the unthinkable.

  He turned to me, guilt plastered on his face. Oh God. “Yes.”

  I ran to him, smacking him across the face, my hand stinging from the impact.

  “You betrayed him! You betrayed us!” I screamed, hitting him on the chest as Mal pulled me away. “Get out! Go before I pull the trigger and shoot you myself!”

  Diva sobbed behind me, the sound of her crying lodging somewhere in the back of my brain. I fell to my knees, distraught, shaking, and rattled to the core. All I could do was picture Alec, alone, captured, and heading straight for a trap.

  Chapter Thirty Eight: Lizzie

  Static. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

  Déjà vu. The radio was as predictable as it was cold and unfeeling. I hated that sound. It never bore good news.

  Static. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

  A shrill blaring issued forth from the radio. It echoed loudly across the yard. Little Benjamin played next to me in the grass, vrooming little cars around the rocks.

  “Breaking news! The militia is releasing an official press release.”